Why Not to Get a Divorce and Save Your Marriage

Estimated read time 4 min read

To divorce or not to divorce? Such a tough question. You may consider divorce if communication is lacking, disagreements are often, or you feel generally disconnected from your partner. These things are perfectly valid reasons to consider divorce, but if both partners are willing to do the work you may decide not to get a divorce.

If your partner breaks a key tenet of your relationship, chooses to leave, becomes abusive, or engages in activities that make you feel unsafe, divorce is important! Are you lingering with the decision to divorce or not? Here are reasons you shouldn’t take that step, according to real money casino for Australians.

  1. Divorce Will Hurt Your Kids

The first reason is something that should give us all pause: the kids. Should you stay married for your children? Well, maybe not, but at least think about how divorce will affect them. You might get over it in time, but they never will.

They will never get over the loss of their family, and their lives will never be the same. Never. When parents start living separate lives, a child’s world is shattered, and they must navigate a new reality. There will be long-lasting financial, emotional, developmental, academic, and psychological repercussions. For that kid, the fairy tale is officially over. Yes, kids do “move on,” but they are affected forever.

  1. Divorce Brings Emotional Devastation

Divorce is emotionally devastating for most people. It forces us to kill all of the hopes and dreams we were counting on when we decided to marry. It separates us from the one person we believed would always be there for us, holding our hand when we got old and feeble. We may deny it, but there is always pain with separation. Divorce is a type of death and we will need to grieve the loss of the relationship just as we would if a person we love died.

Divorce is the ultimate rejection because we are either rejecting or being rejected by the one person who knew us best in this world. These days, we’ve grown so accustomed to people splitting up that this silent pain is often ignored and not acknowledged, but it’s still real. People often try to alleviate the pain with addictions or new relationships, but these don’t heal the wounds. Many people are never the same after a divorce, because everything they thought was real and true is gone.

  1. Divorce Leads to Loss of Confidence

We grow up thinking that we will marry and be happy. When we “fail” at that, our self-confidence and belief in ourselves is deeply affected. We have failed at one of the key jobs of adulthood: to find a suitable mate and make it work. When my second husband and I were still dating, he was very reluctant to make a commitment to marry. In fact, it was terrifying to him. You see, he had “failed” at marriage once, and he did not want to fail again.

Another aspect of confidence that is affected is our confidence in our desirability. This is why newly divorced people often go through a stage of serial dating, desperately seeking to re-establish themselves as being attractive and wanted. Or they may fall into another relationship right away, rebounding instead of carefully choosing someone who is healthy for them, compounding and complicating the already raw wound of divorce. Some might have to play games at meilleur casino francais en ligne to get relieved or release stress.

  1. You May Experience Loss of Identity

When divorce happens, both individuals lose that familiar role of husband or wife. Even if the marriage is troubled, there is still security in knowing that you are this person’s spouse. All of that is gone when the divorce papers are signed. You are no longer the wife of so-and-so; you are now just their ex—not a very affirming title. Women feel this in a very literal way as they go from “Mrs.” to a “Ms.” Not only that, but many women must wrestle with the decision of changing their name back to their maiden name or continuing to identify with a name that no longer reflects who they are.

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